Asking For It

Pushing her to the wall, roughly, violently, angrily, his satisfaction
at the release of his rage making him throb in his pants. He'd never
forced a woman to do anything before, but she had provoked and
provoked and provoked, always saying no, always moving his hands away!

Grabbing her hands and twisting her body, the young man thrust again
against the wall, rubbing her body against it as his bulging pants
ground hard against the rising hem of the skirt above her pert round
ass. It was time to make that ass pay the checks it was writing. He
bit down on her shoulder, her skin glistening with moisture already
from the heat of the summer day, the heat that would not go out of his
head, the heat that clouded his mind, the heat that was just one more
straw on the mound of mounting stress that made him too furious to
control himself.

She moaned, her body taken, her legs spreading. Every buck of his hips
against her ass thrusting and rubbing her whole body between the wall
and his chest. Oh how she moaned, moaned out a hushed and whispered
plea, "...no... no... please no..."

His hand moved before he even thought about what he was doing. It
struck across her bared ass with a violent clap of palm and fingers
across vulnerable skin, leaving it tingling, and slightly off color in
the center of her cheek. She let out a moaning cry, thrusting her ass
against his hand before the second strike fell. Was she still
encouraging him? Her further cries from each strike silencing her
pleading lips.

His fingers grabbed and arched and finally the spanking slowed as he
tore at her underwear, his fingers pushing forward and rubbing deep
along the lips of her c%n# from behind as his palm reached down her
bare and deeply shaded ass. They probed, and prodded, feeling damp as
he stroked through the thin fabric of the garment, before tearing it
aside and stroking bare flesh. Faint curses barely even whispered
escaped her lips when his fingers began to work inside of her,
whispers lost entirely amidst the moans the feelings she was unable to
control as they made her body succumb to his teasing.

Without even a thought, his pants were undone, and his hard throbbing
shaft was buried to his balls in her tight flesh, his right hand
wrapped around her body. Her shirt was ripped open to her middle, her
breast exposed, her bra displaced as her nipples displayed openly, as
much as the wetness leaking between her thighs, her needs, and
betrayed the false nature of her struggles. Her arms twisted, her body
squirmed, all a show of resistance, each action only grinding her
body, as every inch of it had seemed to become a sensual erogenous
zone, rubbed against her aggressor.

He filled her up, violating her. It was quick, and violent. Both
bodies sweat from the exertion as he forced her again and again, mixed
fluids dripping down her thighs. They grew sticky with sweat and seed
clinging together whenever their sides touched.

When he had done with her, he pulled back, dripping, his pants about
his ankles and threw her to the bed in anger, his c%!* still raging
hard from the heat of the moments. She lay there, her clothes ripped,
every hidden bit of her flesh exposed, sweaty, and covered in the
secretions of their sins.

Her lips parted, and she moaned, "I've been waiting for you to get the
balls to do that for weeks..."

Those words drizzled through the air like oil as they massaged their
way into his ears, her form twisting as he stood, towering over her as
she lay spent on the bed, her fingers reaching upward... wrapping
around his c%!*.. and followed shortly by her briefly still unsullied
lips...

I Love Poetry

by Langston Hughes:
The new wikipedia tour of poets is pretty excellent so far. I'm
touring both poets and wine, and while the wine is extremely
educational, I'm loving the poets more. Every email so far has
introduced me to a knew poet, or one that I'd heard the poetry of but
didn't know the name. Today, though, it was simply a very good reason
to revisit the works of Langston Hughes. Everyone should take this
wikipedia tour, and remember to find the links in the article to
poems.

"Harlem" by Langston Hughes
What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over
like a syrupy sweet?
Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.

Or does it explode?

Recipes From Steven

THE GREAT AMERICAN HAMBURGER

American-Burger.jpg
Source: The Barbecue Bible by Steven Raichlen (Workman, 2008)
Method: Direct grilling
Serves: 6

For the burgers:

2-1/4 pounds ground beef (preferably ground chuck)
6 slices (each 1/2-inch thick) Vidalia or other sweet onion (optional)
2 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted, or 2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
Salt and freshly ground black pepper
6 hamburger buns

For the toppings– any or all:

Iceberg lettuce leaves
Sliced ripe tomatoes
Sliced dill pickles or sweet pickles
Cooked bacon (2 slices per burger)
Ketchup, Mustard, and Mayonnaise

Divide the meat into six equal portions. Lightly wet your hands with
cold water, then form each portion of meat into a round patty about 4
inches across.

Set up the grill for direct grilling and preheat to high.

When ready to cook, brush and oil the grill grate.

If using onion slices, brush them on both sides with melted butter and
season with salt and pepper. Place the onion on the hot grate and
grill until nicely browned, about 4 minutes per side, then transfer to
a plate.

Brush one side of the meat patties lightly with melted butter and
season with salt and pepper. Arrange the burgers, buttered side down,
on the hot grate and grill until the bottoms are nicely browned, 4 to
5 minutes. Brush the tops lightly with some of the melted butter and
season them with salt and pepper. Using a spatula, turn the burgers
and grill until they are browned and cooked to taste, 4 to 5 minutes
longer for medium. Meanwhile, brush the cut sides of the buns with the
remaining melted butter and toast them, cut sides down, on the grill
during the last 2 minutes the burgers cook.

Set out the toppings. Put the burgers and onion slices on buns and serve.

WASABI GOAT CHEESE LAMB-BURGER

Source: Recipe courtesy of Steven Raichlen
Method: Direct grilling
Serves: 6

2-1/2 pounds ground lamb
1 3-inch log of goat cheese, chilled
Coarse salt (kosher or sea) and freshly ground black pepper
6 pita breads
3 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
Wasabi Cream for serving (recipe follows)

Lightly wet your hands with cold water and divide the ground lamb into
12 equal portions. Form each into a round patty about 1/2 inch thick.
Cut the goat cheese into six equal rounds.

Place a round of goat cheese on a lamb patty; top with another patty
and seal the edges.

Set up the grill for direct grilling and preheat to high.

When ready to cook, brush and oil the grill grate. Brush one side of
the lamb patties lightly with olive oil and season with salt and
pepper. Arrange the burgers, oiled side down, on the hot grate and
grill until the bottoms are nicely browned, 4 to 5 minutes. Brush the
tops lightly with olive oil and season them with salt and pepper.
Using a spatula, turn the burgers and grill until they are browned and
cooked to taste, 4 to 5 minutes longer for medium. Meanwhile, brush
the pita breads with the remaining olive oil and toast them on the
grill during the last 2 minutes the burgers cook.

Split or slice the pita breads to accommodate the burgers. Serve with
Wasabi Cream.

Wasabi Cream

Makes about 1 cup

1 to 2 tablespoons wasabi powder, or more to taste
1 tablespoon lemon juice (or more as needed)
1 cup mayonnaise (Hellmann's preferred)

Combine the wasabi powder and lemon juice and mix until a smooth paste
is formed. Let sit for 5 minutes for the flavors to develop. Add the
mayonnaise and whisk to combine. Refrigerate until serving time.

Birthday

My birthday was pretty good. I heard from a lot of people and I felt
really loved. I am having to cancel my bbq plans for tomorrow at my
mom's request, and there is no schedule to have them some other time.
I'm not happy with that, but c'est la vi...

Memorial Day Addendum

So I don't forget, I am proud to say that Robert, Cassie, Matt,
Michael Anne, Justin, Cymeron, Tim, Jamie, Jackson, Jake, John, Kevin,
Russell, Greg, Trent, Chuck, and my mom all made it to the party, and
it was my pleasure and honor to cook for all of them.

Memorial Day

Super late blog follows:

Memorial day was awesome. Almost everyone chipped in. I've never in my
life cooked a brisket with all the extras for so cheap. Only 60 bucks
and the whole party of 17 - 19 people was fed to stuffed.

I made the best brisket in my life, which was surprising. I overcooked
it a little, so the meat was a bit tough, but the seasoning was the
best I've ever done. But I also did something else special.. instead
of just slicing it, all of it, including awkwardly slicing the tip.. I
chopped the tip up to make chopped beef sandwiches with, which turned
out AMAZING. People loved the brisket, but the sandwiches were even
more impressive and they were devoured incredibly quickly.

Kevin FINALLY brought the potato salad that his mom makes that he is
always bragging about. And.. I really have to say, it was every bit as
good as he described. It was the mustard kind, which is my favorite.
I've only had his mom's cooking a few times, but she is very good.

Robert made it, and he brought some lemon souffles, which were
delicious! I loved them, and learned how to make them on wednesday
after a long day at work. I really like Chefs 2b.

The parties are going really well there, and I'm having lots of fun
doing them. I particularly like making the cupcakes, because the
batter tastes so good.

Anywho, I don't remember all the events, but Rock Band went VERY well
that night, I made a breakthrough on the drums and I can beat almost
every song on medium now. Soon on to hard. Everyone played a lot.

It was awesome, Jake managed to come over even though he was very
tired from a weekend of partying at a relative's reunion.

Okay, tomorrow is my birthday and tonight my mom is taking me out to
eat, so I am out of here. I don't know what we're eating, but I can't
wait to find out.

War

If you consider that there has been an average of 160,000 troops in the Iraq
theatre of operations during the last 22 months, and a total of 2,112
deaths, that gives a firearm death rate of 60 per 10,000 soldiers.

The firearm death rate in Washington D.C. is 80.6 per 10,000 for the same
period.

That means that you are about 25% more likely to be shot and killed in
theU.S. Capitol, which has some of the strictest gun control laws in the
nation, than you are in Iraq.

Conclusion: The U.S. should pull out of Washington immediately.

Indiana Jones

Pretty good movie. Saw it Wednesday night, and I was pretty impressed. Very old school. Not absolutely amazing, but very enjoyable.

I also started playing the Penny Arcade game, beautifully named "On the Rain Slick Precipice of Darkness: Episode One", which I have already finished and found IMMENSELY wonderful, so much so that I am VERY eagerly awaiting Episode Two. The characters were beautifully done, the transitions between animation and 3d were excellently performed, the combat well balanced, and the pacing of the entire experience very precisely executed for a very superbly paced experience.

Also, the cooking classes at Chefs 2b are getting much better, today I was on time, well paced, the only mistake I made was not filling up the cupcake papers high enough and wasting a little batter, but next time I will do better. When I talk to Robert, now that he's back from his honeymoon, I'm going to ask him if Jeannette, who has been wonderful.

My free HD DVDs from Toshiba arrived in the mail. Only got one of the ones I asked for, Aeon Flux. They sent me a copy of The Departed, which I already own, The Order of the Phoenix, which I'm not interested in owning, Casino, which, admittedly, I've never seen before, Mission Impossible 2, which I disliked entirely. So.. I got one good movie and one that may be good. Pretty lame deal.

I really shouldn't try to catch up three or four weeks of not blogging regularly with one post. I'm barely scratching the last few weeks surface, because even being swamped at work I've managed to completely fill my spare time.

Oh well. It's good that I'm busy.

I have another kids party for Chefs 2b tomorrow.

Fun Stuff

Should Animals Be Doing More For The Animal Rights Movement?

Recipes

PERUVIAN-STYLE CHICKEN

Insanely popular in Lima and in Peruvian communities in the U.S. For
maximum crispness and to speed up the cooking process, the chicken is
spatchcocked (butterflied). Note: in Peru, you'd use a fiery yellow
chili called aji amarillo (use 1 to 2). This recipe approximates the
flavor by mixing yellow bell pepper and habanero.

Method: Direct grilling
Serves: 2 to 4
Advance Preparation: 2 to 12 hours for marinating the chicken

For the marinade and sauce:
1 yellow or orange bell pepper
1 habanero pepper, or 2 jalapeno peppers, or more to taste
One small onion, peeled and roughly chopped
1/4 cup fresh cilantro leaves
2 to 3 tablespoons fresh lime juice, or to taste
2 cloves garlic, roughly chopped
1 teaspoon coarse salt (kosher or sea), or to taste
1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1/2 teaspoon cumin
1/4 teaspoon turmeric
1/4 cup vegetable oil
1 cup mayonnaise (Hellmann's preferred)

For the chicken:
1 whole chicken (about 3-1/2 to 4 pounds)

Stem, seed, and devein the bell pepper and the habanero and chop
roughly. Combine in a blender container with the onion, cilantro, lime
juice, garlic, salt, pepper, cumin, turmeric, and vegetable oil. Blend
until fairly smooth. In a small bowl, combine 3 tablespoons of the
marinade mixture (reserve the remainder) with the mayonnaise and stir
to combine. Cover and refrigerate the mayonnaise mixture until ready
to serve.

Place the chicken, breast side down, on a cutting board. Using poultry
shears or a sharp knife, cut through the flesh and bone along both
sides of the backbone. Cut from the tail end to the head end and
completely remove the backbone.

Open out the chicken (like opening a book) by gently pulling the
halves apart. Using a sharp paring knife, lightly score the top of the
breastbone. Run your thumbs along and under the sides of the
breastbone and attached cartilage and pop them out. Spread the bird
out flat.

Turn the bird over. Using a sharp knife, make a slit in the skin
between the lower end of the breastbone and the leg, on each side,
approximately 1/2 inch long (you're trying to accommodate the end of
the drumstick). Stick the end of the drumstick on that side through
the slit.

Put the spatchcocked chicken into a nonreactive baking dish and pour
the marinade over it, turning to coat completely. Cover with plastic
wrap and refrigerate for at least 2 hours, or as long as overnight.

Set up the grill for direct grilling and preheat to medium. When ready
to cook, brush and oil the grill grate. Arrange the chicken on the
grate, skin-side down. Grill for 12 to 15 minutes per side, turning
once with tongs and a spatula. The chickens can be a little awkward to
turn; you'll need to use both utensils. If the skin browns too much,
lower the heat or move the chicken to a cooler section of the grill.
The chicken is done when an instant-read meat thermometer inserted
into the thickest part of a thigh (but not touching the bone)
registers 170 degrees F. Or to play it safe, you can indirect grill
the bird—in which case, place it skin side up on the grill and
indirect grill for about 40 minutes.

Let the bird rest for 3 to 5 minutes, then carve and serve with the
mayonnaise sauce.

PLJESKAVICA
(BOSNIAN BURGERS)

These spicy flat burgers turn up throughout the Balkans, especially in
Bosnia-Herzegovina. Flatten the burger to the thickness and size of a
pita bread. The easiest way to do this is to flatten it on a metal or
stone work surface, then pry it off with a slender metal spatula.

Method: Direct grilling
Serves: Serves 4
Advance Preparation: 1/2 to 1 hour for letting the meat rest

12 ounces ground beef, preferably ground chuck
12 ounces ground veal (or substitute more ground beef)
2 cloves garlic, minced
1/2 medium onion, minced
1 to 2 serrano peppers, stemmed, seeded, and minced (see Note)
1/4 cup parsley, minced
1-1/2 teaspoons coarse salt (kosher or sea), or more to taste
1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper, or more to taste
Grilled pita bread for serving
Tomato slices and lemon wedges for serving (optional)

Combine the beef, veal, garlic, onion, serrano pepper(s), parsley,
salt, and black pepper in a large bowl. Knead the mixture gently with
your hands until thoroughly blended. Cover the bowl with plastic wrap
and refrigerate for 30 minutes to 1 hour.

Divide the meat in four equal portions. Mold each into a large flat
disk, like a pita bread, on the back of a metal baking sheet or stone
countertop. Each burger should be about 6 inches across and 1/4-inch
thick.

Set up your grill for direct grilling and preheat to high. Brush and
grill the grill grate.

Loosen the burger from the baking sheet, sliding a slender metal
spatula under it. Transfer it to the grill. Grill until cooked
through, 2 to 3 minutes per side. The internal temperature on an
instant read meat thermometer inserted through the side will be at
least 160 degrees.

Transfer to a large plate or platter and serve at once with pita,
tomato slices, and lemon wedges for squeezing.

Note: For a hotter pljeskavica, leave the seeds in.

Strange Dream

I dreamed that my grandma, grandpa, sister, and a stranger showed up
at work, and I thought they were bringing work for me, but instead
they wanted me to bring rock band and wario ware to my dad's house to
play later. My sister never said anything.

Poetry

My troubled mind engaged in midnight pondering,
focused on a distant shore.
A sleepless night of troubled and thoughtful wandering,
dreaming of the night before.

Carnal visions mark my soul,
marks and scrapes adorn my skin.
From a room as dark as velvet and coal,
my new obsession did begin.

Beer and Cooking

I don't really have a lot of time to go into all the details.. but
this weekend.. was rough...

I didn't sleep at all on friday night, and I didn't get much sleep on saturday.

Saw my dad in misery in the hospital.

I witnessed Zac's mom get the most horrible wound I've ever seen on
her shin... I feel so bad for her.

The cooking class that I taught on sunday was a disaster, a real
disaster, filled with all kinds of smaller disasters. I really don't
want to go into it, but I wish I had done much better since it was my
first time. They still want me to teach again, though.

There were 3 good things... The concert was pretty good. I got to
spend a good amount of time hanging out with friends among whom were
Mike and Newman, both of whom I have missed a great deal. And finally,
the beer we brewed on sunday was the most flawlessly executed beer day
we've ever had. We cooled down the wort at a record speed, we mixed it
right, we did the boil perfectly and quickly, with less than a quarter
of a gallon of evaporation loss. We have never so smoothly and
skillfully brewed and fermented a wort, I can only hope that the beer
is good.

The Long Stretch of Road

I'm turning the corner for the long weekend. And I don't mean the type
of long weekend where I get extra days off. My weekend plans started
at 5:45 this morning, and included working early so I'd have time for
everything. On top of my obligations to visit Zac and my dad, and
trying to visit Mike, then the foodites on saturday morning, and
cooking class on saturday evening, I could end up spending sunday
brewing, which, since Mike has never been a part of it, should be fun
for him. Can't wait to see what he has to say about our beers. I think
that they have turned out to be tremendously superb.

I am going to need a VERY good night's sleep come monday night after I
do this whole routine of coming to work early to acomodate plans for
monday evening. I really hope that I'm qualified to teach these
classes, since I've never done it before, I'm quite nervous. How much
do I let the kids do? How much do I trust them not to cut themselves
with the knives? How old are they? Will I remember exactly how to make
the strawberry shortcake dough right? I get nervous like this, it's
amazing that I don't get too paralyzed to do things like this when the
time comes. It's terrifying.

Oh, yeah, and... on a last minute whim I saw the midnight pre-release
showing of Iron Man last night.. at like 9:30, the showing after the
8:00 showing.. before the 11:00.. none of which were actually AT
midnight. They're really getting slack on their definitions.

I'm not going to complain about that, though, I had to wake up at
5:45, so... fine by me.. get out, get home, get to sleep asap was my
motto for the movie last night.

Commentary on the times of midnight releases aside, it was a brilliant
and fun movie, Robert Downey Jr is just fun to watch, he's like a
sarcastic Tom Hanks. As great as the story, the graphics, the fights,
and the other characters are, his one liners are what really separated
this gem from the crowd of action flicks this year... and this is only
the beginning.. Indiana Jones, Batman, Wall-E, Chronicles of Narnia,
and I know there are others that I can't remember off the top of my
head.. going to be a big summer. Biggest ever, I think, as far as
movies that I like go...

My girl is the best. She writes beautiful poetry that expresses an amazing soul.

Something New

Well, it's early to bed tonight, and early to rise tomorrow. I hope
that the next two days goes well. Concert tomorrow night, and then
Lasagna party at Chefs 2b saturday night.

It's been a long slow day that I've spent doing some thinking. I
really need a new job. Pretty badly. I need to have my resume turned
into Continental by sunday night.

Blogging for Blogging Sake

I found out my dad was in the hospital today. That's twice in
something like 3 weeks. This time it's worse and better at the same
time. I'm really worried about him. I heard he was in a lot of pain
and that they are giving him morphine.

I really want GTA IV. Really badly. It's a challenge to not buy it
even though I have other games, and no money.

Pregnancy, Wow

Well, turns out my old girlfriend Gabrielle is pregnant. She just
found out this weekend, and... the only thing I know how to say is
that I'm very happy for her.. but very sad for me. I remember wanting
to marry her. I remember being absolutely nuts about her. She would
make me smile all the time, we would play games, and.. yeah. And it
was a good time in my life, followed by some not so great times.

Not too long ago I had some really good times again. I can't tell
anymore if they're mostly over or if they are really only just
beginning, but they have been some VERY good times, and I am a better
person for the girl I love now.

But it still kindof wrecks up my heart to see one more ex pregnant and
starting a family with a love she found after ditching me. It makes me
feel quite a bit like dead weight. Like maybe I'm what girls date
before moving on to a better life. It's a pretty solid blow to my self
esteem.

Anyway, I weary of this subject. Martian Child is a really great
movie, I love every minute of it.

What Dreams May Come is a lousy book. Unless you view it from the
perspective that the characters are in their own personal hell devised
by their inability to wait any length of time, willing to hurt
themselves and anyone around them who cares about them rather than
display the patience to wait, and be comforted by their friends and
family.

I'm going to go... um... I don't know. Do something...

Prisma Pencils

Awesome Day

I got to go to the best Greek restaurant in all of houston today. It
was an amazing treat, but what I liked even more than the food, which
was divine, was the server.. he was wonderful, and funny, and just
great to talk to about the food with.

After that, we went back to my place and played Rock Band for 5 hours
straight, and it was so amazing with four people. I'd write so much
more about today, but, it's late, I'm very very tired. The only thing
I can imagine that would have made this day better is if I'd been able
to share it with my best friend.

Good night, all...

Car Repairs

460$ to get my clutch fixed for the same problem I paid 1500 a year
and a half ago and endured through horrendous pains at the hands of
the hideous Car Car One nazis to get repaired. I am never going to
Domestic Auto Experts again. They have a lot of image, but it's always
been overpriced, I think they do a lot of un-necessary work.

Don't know what I'm doing tonight, may be going to the movies with my
mom or playing rock band, I haven't decided which.

I am so in love with someone.

Re: Women

What does it take to make yourself appealing to a woman who has you
totally and completely wrapped around her thumb? Why are women so
starved for attention that they aren't happy without so many men
wrapped around their thumb?

It's maddening and perplexing, I've tried time after time and I can't
do it. How does anyone infatuate someone with a beautiful heart, mind,
and soul, for a lifetime? It's been done before, I've seen it done.
I've tried being mysterious, smart, worldly, erotic, entertaining,
funny, sly, dashing, charming, honest, and all for naught. I always
lose. Always to other guys.

I'm really tired of it. I've wasted too much of my life on girls who
don't return the affection that I give.

I'm seriously starting to think that women are only good for a couple
of weeks of fun, and then you need to get bored of them before they
can get bored of you.

Wow

Okay, so, I've tried out a few other journal sites, but I'm back here. Nobody read my stuff anywhere else, and really, this should be a personal journey anyway. I'm going to be posting here regularly every day again.

http://www.techcrunch.com/2008/04/18/encyclopedia-britannica-now-free-for-bloggers/

This is actually pretty awesome. I can see the marketing value in it, and EB certainly does have its advantages over Wikipedia. No contested articles from disreputable sources attempting to change entries for unsavory reasons. And some of the features are pretty impressive. And, used as a tool by bloggers with the features mentioned in that article, it could be a powerful tool for spreading information.

I think I'm going to check it out.

Tonight, though, I am really looking forward to going to a satyr meal with my mother to celebrate passover. After that, Keda and I might watch episode 14 of deathnote.

I'm in Love

It's funny, I've said that to two people in a row and their responses were nearly identical:

(1:58:42 PM) Friend 2: Oh yeah? What's it called?
(2:07:40 PM) Friend 1: with what?

So I don't know how to feel about being so transparent that I can declare that I am completely in love and it be known that I am not talking about a human being.

(2:08:51 PM) Me: What do you mean with what? /:) are you saying that I can't love a person?
(2:09:07 PM) Friend 1: no just that u love things

That doesn't make me feel good. Not the bit about being transparent, I'm fine with that, but... that I love things. This is not the first time that I've felt that I use the word love far too loosely, although only in respect to things. I mean, I don't LOVE them... or do I? Do I care about the emotional and physical well being of them? I suppose I have a formula for how much I care about something in my head...

Y=X*n*l, where Y == to how much I care about something, X == to how replaceable it is and the effort required to replace it, n == how intimately acquainted I am with it, and l == how much I like it.

So, represented in percentages... 100% being impossible without ruining the scale, this website/show == 5*80*80, or something like that, I'm not very precise. Sometimes these things are really hard to judge. I'm really curious if that puts it over a starving child in China... It's up there. Is that horrible? I haven't been directly confronted with the choice of saving a starving child in China at the cost of immediately or saving America's Test Kitchen, maybe that's a good thing. But the idea of my loving things... that scares me. Things are replaceable, that should disqualify them, perhaps I attach more feeling to things than the formula says I should?

Oh, yeah, America's Test Kitchen happens to be the site/show in question for today. I absolutely adored this episode that was one this afternoon, and while I was browsing for that episode and its recipes I found this recipe.

Anywho, so, I really think I want to make that second recipe tonight for whoever would like to come over and have some. Just comment here if you'd like to.

Ordered more tea last night. Should be here by Weds or Thurs. I got some chocolate strawberry tea to test and see if it's a good valentines present, if it is, I'm going to give that to my mom.

You know what? I may do the crisp-skin high-roasted chicken tonight instead, depending on which recipe is cheaper to prepare while I'm at the grocery store. If I do the high-roasted chicken, I'm going to use earl grey green to season the butter under the skin.

*sigh* too good to be true

It would seem that teachef is about half a month out of date, still stuck on dec of '06. Do they no longer function? *le sigh* I really would be sad to see that I'd missed something so good.

And here I thought I'd discovered a cleverly concealed secret just for people like me.


I can at least hope that the failure to update for over a month isn't a bad sign. Please let it not be a bad sign, please let this be a budding and awesome website.

Ha! Twice a night!

So, it's late. I know. What do I do right before bed? I wander down lists in my mind and try to imagine anything I've forgotten. And so, tonight, I had something cool.

I love adagio. It's really an impressive company, I find myself in the beginning of a long time love affair with their teas, I've found other places that intrigue me, but none that really cater to me and my palate quite so deliciously(You like that adjective?). I was showing off some of my teas to my grandma last weekend when I was up visiting family for post christmas cheer, having missed the holidays due to obligations. As it happens, that while doing so, I noticed that there was a web address right there on my tins, and one that was NOT for adagio!!!

My mind began to wonder, is adagio a subsidiary of another company? What IS teachef?

Not having immediate access to the internets, I let it slip my mind. Of course, making tea every day, several times a day, I noticed it on and off again, always at inconvenient times. So odd... so... incongruent.

Until tonight. Sitting here, only moments before sleep, it occurred to me that I should follow up this raging incongruity. Lo and behold! I fell instantly in love:

"TeaChef is a community of people who are passionate about two things: cooking and tea. Or, more specifically, cooking with tea."

Be still my beating, lusting, passionate heart!!! I have heard of cooking with tea before, the idea has always intrigued me, and I have even looked longingly at my teas as I thought of meats that I had not at my immediate disposal. I instantly applied for the sample of this months tea. My mind is already simply smoldering with ideas that rage through my burning sleepless eyes.

So help me... I hope that I am chosen. It would be a thrill to have friends over and test out recipes taking advantage of this exquisite opportunity. To be fair, even if I don't get sent a sample, I will procrastinate no more, my next cook off, I will be making something with tea. It is always like an adrenaline shot to the heart when there is such vast potential in the crossing of THREE passions at once!

It would seem at first only 2...

But I count the passion of having large groups gather to partake of quality food for careful consideration.

Pan's Labyrinth

An awe inspiring movie, brutal to watch, it wrenched my gut observing some of the more brutal parts of the movie that ultimately drew me in all the more and made the scenes more involving emotionally. I couldn't watch that movie a lot though, it could really desensitize me.



So often they say,
Absence makes the heart grow fonder...
And yet so deeply I fear that in a way
Absence makes the heart begin to wander.

I sit here, and I ponder
In the late hour my eyes streak red
My heart with worry to squander
Simply put I should be in bed.

Eyelids drooping though they were made of lead
The object of my desire
In my eyes reflections can be read
Though craving I now retire.

Good night.

New Tea

New tea has arrived today. I ordered a couple of samples mixed in with the meat of the order... chamomile, and earl grey bravo. They are both to die for, I cannot wait to try them. Well, okay, not try them, I've tried them, I ordered them in larger tins because they drive my palate wild, but, I mean... well, you know what I mean.

I've found another property of blood orange that I don't particularly care for... like grape juice, it leaves my mouth feeling...dry. Which, I don't like in a drink. I prefer beverages that wet my mouth instead of giving me cotton mouth. It's the only tea that does that. I don't like that chamomile is so hard to clean out of my tea maker, but wow, it's so delicious that it's absolutely worth every bit of the trouble.

Anyway, back to doing more coding..

It's Dark

I don't usually start posting till this late. I've had quite a bit of work to do at work lately, and that... well, that's a little out of sorts with the norm.

Other than that, today has been a pretty hollow day, mostly just the norm, a little tea, some breakfast, some programming, a few games here and there, earned richetr mode in the new castlevania. When I get home I need to finish writing my review for that, and I also need to do a review for Mario hoops.

So much to do, so little time...


(I am sad, my habaneros, the ones Tim gave me, rotted. Probably one got it and it spread fast to the others, I only had them a week).

Story Idea

I want to do an undead story. Something mild... something more emotional that scary, a real ghost story with deeper roots in human beliefs and folk lore instead of a horror story. The idea of the dead walking out of disturbance and need, going places in a deep desire to feel alive again, not attacking people or eating brains.

I have some awesome references, and some great ideas. I think the interaction with the living and the dead in REAL life is fascinating... the different ways that we feel just being in the presence of something so human that is devoid of life. It's chilling. Is it still human if it's dead? Part of me knows it is, science says it is. But somehow, it's not the same if it's dead. If it's dead, then... then... it's really just dirt waiting to be processed... imagine that hollowness walking around, craving life, harmlessly walking among the living.

Imagine someone you love. Imagine someone you love who is dead. Imagine them sitting, as they are now, in that state of decomposition.. just standing there, in teh place that they loved the most... lost among the living.

Okay, maybe that is horrific, but it's not... oh who am I kidding? What is my fascination with this....

*sigh*

I am suffering from what may be only a step down from unrequited love. Higher powers have stepped in and made haste to stay my happiness and withhold from me the object of my desires, and it pains my soul.

*sigh*

I can still pine for her. No one can take that away from me.

Kids Need a Stable Home

A lot of people talk about some sort of true meaning of Christmas, as though where it comes from has any sort of significant impact on the now. What is the significance of celebrating a day over and over again? How important is ANY holiday? I've found that culturally the holidays are extremely important as the exchange of product among people IS a foundation for an economy. It's amazing how much work that is for people to enjoy their leisure to such an extreme extent, and that work DOES translate into real world product of sorts.

But emotionally? Spiritually? Is there edification to be had for the mortal soul in such gross indulgences? Am I in effect a better perfect for helping the world around me thrive, or is there a principle difference where I am in fact better off for denouncing the excess that would make the community I live in and the country I am citizen of thrive? Is it excess to be the financial drive for someone with a dream, a dream to do nothing more in life than to dedicate the whole of their time to the creation of a fine candle, an item that would at first glance seem no more important to feeding a mouth than a pebble in a garden?

To be fair, Christmas, at one point in time, was a religious holiday, but that it is no longer a religious holiday, it boggles my mind that people get offended so much over the greeting or well wishing that comes with it. Is it somehow wrong that it no longer holds as much religious significance? I don't think so, I have to admit I am strictly in favor of anything that encourages the strong generosity and warmth of heart that a properly celebrated brings to each individual, and that is not tied to religion. I don't really care why the church picked December 25th, I'm told it is because it was a pagan holiday. I don't care why they picked that date, but the 25th is almost always cold, even in Texas, and during the coldest of the year there is no better time for warmth of any kind.

In short, I'm perplexed by the habits I've been trained with, holidays and the like, and why I celebrate them instead of simply working. Do I do the world justice by taking holiday instead of producing? It calls into question greater meanings of purpose, man given, and meaning. I have a lot to think about today, and tomorrow, but Sunday, when Sunday comes my course of action will be chosen, and I will follow that course wholeheartedly without question, because there is a time for questions, and a time for answers, and if you mix the two then there is no happiness.

Kids Need a Stable Home

Democrats in Power

I wasn't rooting for the Republicans, in fact, I didn't feel like voting at all this election because I wasn't really a fan of anyone, but I really should have voted third party.

First thing I hear after the elections is that the Democrat majority wants to raise the minimum wage. Wow, I’ve heard this before and I’m glad that bullet has been dodged until now.

It really ticks me off. If the minimum wage is raised, it decreases the value of my job, and the work I do by about half. HALF. It makes it possible for every teenager in the world to buy a stupid PS3 and it doesn’t do a single thing to improve the life of someone who can’t afford his or her living expenses. Their money is going someplace else, 9 times out of 10 I would bet on that. It really takes dedication to get stuck in a minimum wage job for life since there are so many companies that realize the value of paying workers higher.

What minimum wage does do? Inflation… devaluing the jobs of people who do earn higher than minimum wage, increases the cost of doing business in the US making the country as a whole less competitive in the world market. Pissed about companies moving their operations to India? Well raise the minimum wage and just watch how fast they run their operations over there after you increase their costs, because raising minimum wage will increase the cost for every single thing.

It just pisses me off that anyone thinks that forcing companies to pay people more will fix anything.

Give massive tax breaks to small businesses that pay their employees higher salaries, do anything like this. Pay for it by making massive companies actually pay taxes, but lord, just flat out making people pay more to people who don’t deserve it… that is flat out bad news.

Pictures!

Books

A young man, lost, with no direction and frustrated with an inability to excell anywhere struggles with wise sounding advice against reality and what to do with his life to find meaning. I don't know how it would end.

Muahahahaha

Angry Letters

I really need to vent here because I know that no one involved will read this. It feels semi private. I'm sick and tired of Tara. I'm tired of her attitude. I'm offended by her view of me, I'm really sick of her not fixing the things her cats have destroyed, and then complaining about minor things when every single post on the stair banister is destroyed.

My satalite chair smells like cat urine. There are dart holes in the wall. About a third of the crap food on the counter was hers. I know the fruit cups weren't Mike's and Marcia would have mentioned them when she mentioned the ramen noodle she was saying I could have.

I'm glad I'm getting out of that house with her because it took every strength of my being to preserve my decency and maintain my self control when her explicative boyfriend Adam called and started yelling at him.

Calm was maintained despite the complete gall and absolute backwards mentality of everything he said. I could go on for just an hour about that. But I did it. I bit my tongue, and I hung up, and I deleted his voicemail without incident. I'm still restraining myself from urges to email her with bitter and resentful words, scathing and representing my feelings.

She is a messy room mate. Her cats are destructive and uncontrolled. And she is a drunk and a pothead.

It really feels very good to have some place to let that out. I saw the way she kept her room, while she was complaining about the rest of the house. Trashed, clothes everywhere, books strewn about, not just her room, but the entire area outside her room, which was completely free of anyone else's influence. Marcia said it's because she didn't have enough space.

Well, let me ask it out loud to myself here, if HALF of a 2 story house, an entire floor, mind you, isn't enough room for JUST YOUR BEDROOM stuff, then how much space is it reasonable for you to live inside of?

/rant

Random Day

Random Day

Went by my house in Kingwood last night and did some cleaning up, grabbed some kitchen utensils that I left behind, took some photos of some things. Kevin came along and let me use his digital camera.

Pics

A Lot

There’s a lot that needs to be said, and I have the time to say it, but I never think to do it till after I don’t have the time anymore. Right now I don’t have the time, but I need to start updating every day again.

Link of the day: www.youos.com

So wicked awesome!!!

School

So, it all started today. I had a good time; I got a professor who I really enjoyed for government I. Anyway, it’s off to a good start… 11 am is always a good start to the morning. It was only about 10 minutes short and there is NO parking by that time in the day.

Anywho, I’m looking at bottling for my sauce. I need to begin actual work on it VERY soon. Roasting needs to be done by Friday. I really would like to also be moved out by then too, that would feel good.

Habanero-Rose

Here's the logo for something I'm working on:

Sometimes...

Sometimes…

I feel like a lousy human being.

Going Away

Going Away

Steve, Chris’ brother, is moving away on Saturday. I’m going to help him throw a good going away party on Friday night, so, everyone who reads this start looking forward to those awesome fajitas.

It’s really sad when a friend moves away, but he’s going to be starting his University time and working towards a doctorate. Go Steve!!!

What is it

What is it?

Why, why, why?!

I’m just up in the air today
Like some kind of balloon
Spinning off the fingers
Of a happy little child

Twisting through the air
Spinning about
A possession of the breeze
At the fancy of the wind

Oh, just let me fall

Mint Julep Ribs

Mint Julep Ribs

The Rub:

2 teaspoons iced tea mix (made with sugar, not artificial sweetener)2 teaspoons granulated sugar2 teaspoons dried mint (peppermint or spearmint)2 teaspoons sweet paprika2 teaspoons coarse salt (kosher or sea)

The Glaze:

3 tablespoons mint jelly3 tablespoons fresh lemon juice3 tablespoons butter1/4 cup bourbon2 tablespoons sugar

Sauce:

1/2 cup ketchup1/2 cup chili sauce1/3 cup mint jelly1/4 cup bourbon2 tablespoons cider vinegar2 tablespoons brown sugar, or to taste1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce1 teaspoon liquid smokeSalt and freshly ground black pepper to taste


Mint Julep

Crush fresh mint into tumbler
Add 1.5oz of sugar syrup
Generous 1.5oz of bourbon
Fill tumbler with crushed ice
Mint on top
Sprinkle with confectioner’s sugar

Rabies

Rabies

Well, we get closer and closer to George’s wedding. Rehearsals are on Friday evening, will be interesting, I haven’t been to a wedding since my dad married Marry Ellen. That was a really good day, I expect this Saturday will be just as good.

The Producers

The Producers

Just got it in the mail and watched it again the other day. I REALLY love this movie, but I should only see it once every six months or so. Six months between viewings leaves me remembering enough that I laugh till my face hurts still, few jokes spoiled. Twice in a month leaves me enjoying myself a lot, but for the more subtle goodness about the movie.

Actually, I did this on, like, Thursday, and then on Friday I watched Drumline. I really liked it quite a bit. Orlando Jones played a character that I really liked and respected, the story was okay, pretty average stuff, but it’s still helped by the aspects of the story based on a real person.

Today, I watched In Her Shoes. It was so good, it had parts where I laughed, and parts where I cried, and parts where I hated a character one minute and loved and sympathized with her the next. That’s a new favorite of mine.

Last night I saw Scanner Darkly. All I can really say without breaking into a full on rant is that it was everything I’d hoped for deep down in my heart.

On Saturday I spent all day with almost all of my friends helping Justin move, it was one of the coolest days ever, even though more than half of it had 0 A/C. It really helped to go swimming afterwards.

Hehe, well, that’s too much to write about, it all feels so incredibly condensed, like a weekend in extreme brief. Next weekend will be worse/better depending on which angle you’re viewing it from.

NJ Continued

NJ Continued…


Well, after getting to NYC on Saturday we popped out around 32nd and… 7th I believe, maybe 8th. Walked all the way up to Times Square, and then spent most of the day bouncing between there, 44th at 7th and 60th at 5th. Around about 4 in the afternoon we got tickets to see the 8 o’clock show of The Producers, a musical comedy I’d seen for the first time in its film translation last December, and which was definitely surpassed by the live Broadway version.

We also ate at Bubba Gump Shrimp, a very good restaurant both times we were over there, I wish we had one down here in Houston, their Bourbon Mahi Mahi was downright fricken awesome. Mike wasn’t adventurous enough to try any of the tiny interesting places we saw around the place.

There was an impressive wedding going on in one of the cathedrals we saw the inside of on the streets traveling between one place and another. The gothic style was extremely impressive.

Two stores that were totally unimpressive: Nintendo Store and Apple store. The Apple store is open 24/7 365, something difficult to appreciate till you need a Mac on Christmas Eve, which, I didn’t since it was early July on a day when places are supposed to be open anyway. Moreover, the selection was still way too similar to the local Mac store in the Galleria mall.

I was incredibly hyped about the Nintendo store till I got there, some very nice displays where out, but when it came right down to it I couldn’t find a single thing worth buying that I couldn’t get anywhere else, no custom styli, or even games that I couldn’t get anywhere else. They had a very interesting little GameBoy museum, but nothing really special about that, it was locked in a case, I’ve seen pics from it online aready. Ultimately a disappointing experience since every single Toys R Us, WalMart, BestBuy, Fry’s, Gamespot, and Eb Games has the same selection, nothing compared to online shopping.

After the Broadway show we took the train back to Morristown, and Sunday was spent recuperating. Neither Saturday nor Monday had very good dinner because of how everything up there closed so early, same with Sunday night. I’m not saying that the hours are horrible, but you definitely have to be prepared for there being times of day where there is literally no where to go get food from if you haven’t eaten yet, meaning keep your fridge stocked.

The second trip to NYC started later, and we saw the Guggenheim, and the Metropolitan museums. The Metropolitan is incredible, I could spend a month there, days on each exhibit studying everything in it carefully and drawing. The Guggenheim not so much, I just wasn’t really impressed by the only exhibit they had, even if most of the side halls had some very good work in them.

We left shortly after the Museums though, Mike was hesitant to go for a walk in central park, so I missed that and the zoo.

Tuesday was also very cool, spent it looking at Ellis and Liberty Islands. I could have skipped Liberty Island completely, but Ellis is a lifetime memory. I can’t think of a better place in the entire world to spend the fourth of July than where so many people spent their first moments in the country. I can only imagine what it was like to pass through there at the time when it was used so much. It rained on us as we were taking off from Liberty, got a little damp.

After the islands, and the rain, not knowing how soon or if the rain would come again, also having nothing to sit on other than wet grass, we decided not to wait for 4 hours after browsing the island museums to see the fireworks so we went to Mike’s apartment and watched some recorded shows that we hadn’t seen before. Wednesday was spent on breakfast and general relaxation before hitting the airport. It wasn’t possible to visit Jason, he just didn’t get in contact with me in time to make plans, I wasn’t even able to talk to him till Monday night, which was just way too late, I didn’t even go back to NYC after that let alone the state. Maybe next time he’ll call me.

I’ll probably go back up again in the not too distant future depending on the outlook, the total for the whole trip was maybe 500 to 600 dollars tops including the plane flight. Next year I’m going to San Diego, lets see how that goes.

Bourbon Sauce

Bourbon Sauce

½ cup butter
3 cloves chopped garlic
1/3 cup Dijon mustartd
1/3 cup hot sauce
1 tablespoon fresh ground pepper
Brown sugar
½ cup Kentucky bourbon

So I've Failed

So I’ve Failed


I used to write journals every single weekday. I really succeeded for a long time, and then I suddenly quit after I was running two journals at the same time. I feel that this really hurt me, and I need to get back in the habit.

Last weekend started Thursday evening and ended late Wednesday night. It was such an incredibly awesome vacation, I flew up to New Jersey, the furthest I’ve ever traveled on my own before, I felt more grown up than anything has ever made me feel before. That’s sad because I’m 25 and I still feel like a kid all the time. Everything is still so scary and new that it’s insane.

The flight up was uneventful, the plane landed and left on time, everything went smoothly, and it was also incredibly dull. The service was just average; everything was just sort of okay at best. The flight back down, however, was an entirely different story, it left two hours late, leaving me at the airport in uncomfortable conditions for a total of four hours, but everyone was even tempered, and once aboard the plane, the captain gave funny announcements even though it was 30 minutes of being taxied before takeoff, and the crew was much more helpful. I was sold headphones to watch the in flight movie, I wasn’t even given the opportunity on the first flight. It was a really good movie too, called something new.  The food was better, and I even had an extremely good book to read during the flight, which was so awesome to contemplate over while I listened to classical music over the headphones, very soothing music, after the movie was over, never ever fly without headphones. Freakanomics is the name of the book. It’s insanely delectable.

I hereby cease to use the word “insane” any longer within this narrative; it is no longer necessary, even though it will contain two trips to NYC. I arrived around about 12:05 in Jersey, and Mike met me at the baggage claim. It took a while to get home after a freak wrong turn, and we stopped and ate at Whitecastle, probably the most dreadful fast food I’ve ever had in my life. After that, sleep commenced at about 2 or 3 in the A.M., and we woke up around 8:30 or 9:30, and had breakfast at a place Mike has been bragging about, and rightfully so.

Perkin’s is a superb breakfast joint. I’d pick them over IHOP any day, I wish they were 24 hours. Their hash brown pancakes are simply mouthwatering, and all their other food was delicious. We made a habit out of breakfasting there, except for one day that it was too crowded so we went to another place called Vermont’s, or something similar, but which was a far cry from Perkin’s.

After that we barely missed the 10:28 train and ended up having to take the 11:24 to NYC for the day. While we were there, some things immediately disappointed me, like Times Square. I really expected more than just a mass of really big stores. None of them even seemed to have the collection of merchandise of other local stores except the classical section of the Virgin Megastore. The day went on like this, store to store, with lots and LOTS of walking for most of the day, a total of slightly over 200 blocks all together for both days inside of NYC.

I have to break for now, I have a lot of work to do, and I probably wont get finished before I have to leave work as it is. I’ll write more tonight or tomorrow.

Grilled Avocado Dessert

Grilled Avocado Dessert

1. avocados,  just  turning  soft,  not  fully  ripe 1  medium  mango,  cut  into  1/2  cubes  1/2  pound  strawberries,  cut  into  1/2-inch  cubes  1  tablespoon  balsamic  vinegar  1/4  teaspoon  Mexene  chili  powder 1/3  cup  orange  juice 2  tablespoons  lemon  juice 1/4  cup  honey  mixed  with  1/4  cup  olive  oil Preheat  well-oiled  bbq  grill  to  medium  high,  300Ú-400Ú  degrees.  Slice  the  avocados  in  half  lengthwise,  and  carefully  remove  the  seed. Brush  the  exposed  flesh  with  honey-olive  oil  mixture,  cover  with  plastic  wrap  and  set  aside  in  a  cool  place  (do  not  refrigerate). Chop  mangos  and  strawberries  and  mix  with  vinegar,  orange  juice,  and  lemon  juice,  let  rest  at  least  20  minutes  so  ingredients  can  blend. Stir  occasionally. Grill  the  avocados  skin  side  down,  2  to  3  minutes,  until  the  skin  begins  to  lightly  char  and  take  on  grill  marks. Brush  the  flesh  side  of  the  avocados  again  with  the  honey-oil  mixture  and  place  the  halves  flesh  side  down  on  hot  grill,  for  another  2-3  minutes. With  a  spatula  carefully  remove  the  avocados  from  the  grill  and  place  on  a  bed  of  lettuce  on  a  warm  serving  plate,  two  halves  per  person. Fill  seed  cavity  with  the  mango-strawberry  salsa,  generously  dribbling  some honey on  the  top  of  each  half. Serve  with  a  spoon  to  scoop  out  the  avocado  flesh  and  salsa. Serves  4

Im in Want

I’m in Want

I’m in want with the DS Lite. Those bright screens, and the excellent redesign in every single aspect of the system is excellent. I absolutely love it, and the price point is perfect, it’s right where the DS was before they started shelving them. It reminds me of the major improvement between the GBA and the GBA SP. I absolutely loved the SP, though if I had tried to play a GBA before the SP came out I would have been totally turned off because of the experience ruining flaws with the hardware, such as the dim screen.

Hardware wise, let this be a lesson, a remembered note, visibility is KING. I want to play my games in broad daylight while waiting in lines or riding places when friend is driving and listening to music. The brighter screens are what really sell this little piece of ass, even though a lot of people probably care more about the redesign of the rest of the body on the DS. Frankly, I liked the look of the original DS, I mean, seriously, who defines what’s sexy in hardware? I mean, case mods are cool and all, but who is retarded enough to spend 300 on gaming hardware because it looks pretty?

Silliness aside, I had a hunch this system would do great things when I first heard it was going to have a touch screen. My mind instantly exploded with possibilities, and I don’t mean absurdities. I mean basic possibilities with massive potential that have finally begun to be exploited about 6 to 10 months ago. It’s getting better though, there is a full-fledged war-game with hexagon tiles and complexity. What does the DS still need, though? There is room to improve.

Multiplayer. Metroid Prime: Hunters has such a deep robust multiplayer environment that it competes with PC FPS games, coming up short to only the very best. Problem? I can’t take advantage of it with anything but bots. The online matchmaking only lets you do that if you have DS friend. So, add random people, you say. Well, how many random people play more than casually? What are the odds that because of the poor showing in friends rooms that random people will be looking for random people instead of friends, since you can only do one or the other?

It’s better than Mario Kart, but not by much. Both fun, no doubt, but they feel so limited to what their online experiences could be, and this is FAR outside of what experiences you can make and still preserve people’s safety online. Take a look at the best PC games and their multiplayer, the definitive online experience, and the largest user base for ideas to making matchmaking easier. Sure, keep the random game finding feature, but open up the ability for players to go looking for each other, to join game rooms and servers where they can see other players waiting for them, regardless of the skill level. Add the ability to add friends in session instead of just during the few menu moments. Give all players the option to define games and limits, and game types, and not just “Friends” who may or may not ever actually be online.

They will learn, it’s coming. If it doesn’t come from first party games, third party will follow. But it will come, the system has already bloomed.

Sleep is Precious

Sleep is Precious

So it’s sort of a lazy day. I’m actually surprised I feel as good as I do considering last night was the worst sleep I’ve ever had. I mean, the evening started well, George had his birthday, which was very good. He treated us to Outback Steakhouse. I had some wicked good food. Got George a bottle of Goldschlager, a superior beverage if ever there was one to be had; I also picked up a bottle of Drambui for myself. Anyway, I got some really good food, but the real shine was the salad. Outback’s chopped bleu cheese salad is WICKED good, with roasted pecans and some other things in it, it’s sweet, tangy and delicious all at once.

So, about halfway through dinner, I started feeling a headache come on so I went home instead of going to George’s for cookies. On the drive my stomach started hurting and I got quite queasy. I started feeling a little better when I got home, but by the time I went to bed, the headache blossomed into a throbbing mess. It HURT. I got almost no sleep at all the whole night. I was up by 5 am playing Oblivion with the pain throbbing. I eventually took some aspirin and by the time I went to work I was feeling much better.

I don’t know what to do for dinner though. I’m all better now, and when I get home I’m going to watch more 4400. After that, sweet dreams to me. Anywho, I’m out of here for now.

Hastily Jotted Notes

Why do people look for the holy grail? Why do they fight and die over it? What is it about belief and meaning that make history so relevant?

Things I used to think were silly I see now with so much clarity, the significance of the ages is so awesome. Why do people care about these things? It's more elusive a question than asking what these things really are.

What is more important than a secret? The importance of the secret.

What is more important than knowing? Understanding.

Does that make the secret insignificant? No, to look for something for a lifetime and find that you were looking at it all wrong, that what you were looking for may exist but that there is a greater importance that is on the other side brings shivers to my core... how valuable is a focus that drives an inquiring mind to destinations untold? Does it matter what the focus is?

Things Constantly Lost

I'm always forgetting things, and I ought to write this here, so that I may not forget it again for a very long time. Gamespotting was a very good thing. I came weekly, fanatically almost, to read the opinions of every editor, I found it extremely worth my time in that it offered a lot of insight and inspired a lot of internal debate for me, and gave me a lot of link fodder, and even introduced me to the forums at 3d Buzz where I spent several years time on the forums making good friends.

This is the best Gamespotting editorial ever. I loved every minute of it. It was both intriguing, genuine, and at the very same time satirical to its core.

Whenever I remember Gamespotting, I remember that article, and I happened upon it so easily when in the past I've spent hours digging it up because of my current rank, Minus World.

Curious to the meaning, I did a search on it, and it led me to Gamespotting 87, and at the top of the list, the article I remember so very well. I post the link here, so that maybe I wont forget it so very easily in the future. Here's hoping that I remember where I kept it.

A friend in need

A friend in need

My mom is a friend in need. I need to help her move, I need to make it to a minor emergency clinic on the way home. I need to get my car fixed, it’s leaking radiator fluid, not fun. I need my plants to stop dying. Joe needs a job. My sister needs gas money to get places.

It was a pretty good weekend, had a big party at George’s house on Saturday, he paid for a bbq, and I used logs for the first time ever. Real logs. Three of them cooked everything in my entire grill better than a whole bag of charcoal. It was 18 dollars for a massive bag of pecan wood. The food was wicked delicious; George bought thick tender strip steaks for me to grill, corn, and pineapple. It was wicked awesome. I am never going back to charcoal. Then we went swimming. Again, awesome. My toe hurt really badly after, though. Got to my car at about 2 am then went mother’s day shopping with my sister at walmart and got super good gifts for both of my mothers.

It was a really good day, mostly, finished up around 4:30 am, then went home, played around a bit then slept till 2 in the evening. After that got sushi with my mom and fiddled with my toe then ate dinner with my dad and Mary Ellen. Very good day overall. Then went home and went to sleep very early. The large part of the day was spent trying not to mention how I found out that it was in fact my mom who gave my sister, a smoker now, the first cigarette she ever smoked. I was disillusioned and disappointed.

Anyway, I had intended to go to the doctor this morning but I was still so tired from the night before that I slept till 10. I feel really good now though, not tired at all.

Games

Well, another E3 come and gone. It’s a very exciting time of year, with Call of Cthulhu, Oblivion, Dreamfall, Metroid Prime: Hunters, Worms 3d, Brain Age, Tetris DS, and a host of other games already out, with Heroes V, the best one yet, only around the corner and prepped for release on the 23, wow, with Dark Messiah of Might and Magic, Gothic 3(three near perfect RPGs in a single year!), Star Fox DS, the Wii, Zelda for the Wii, Red Steel, everything for the Wii in general, all the gaming goodness for the DS that I’ve barely touched on, and even MORE games for the PC… this year was already ranking high as years go, if even a quarter of the things that are due out this year make it, it will be definitively the best year in gaming yet. Heck, if you’re a PC gamer, go ahead and count Condemned: Criminal Origins as an amazing game for this year since it got ported last month. I almost want to cry.

Anyway. Life isn’t all fun and games but I’m really not in the mood to write about things that bother me lately. Just gets depressing to write about. There’s lots on my mind that just sort of pushes me one way or another and I have no idea what I want out of life, not even a vague clue. So many opportunities, I just worry that what’s going to happen is I’m going to miss ALL of them, and end up with nothing for lack of deciding on one good thing. I’m already well on my way to that.

Toes

Toes

The right side of my toe is so bad it sucks, but because it shrinks all the way down to normal except for the infected bit right over the nail I know it’s not a problem with a serious abscess or anything like that, so I’m not stressed about losing the toe or whatever, I just really need the nail to grow out. *le sigh*

Tonight I’m going to go eat sushi with Jake and some other people to celebrate the end of finals, that should be pretty kick ass.

I’d write more but I’ve been really busy and I don’t have the focus to do it right now, so I’ll probably post again later tonight.

Awakenings

Awakenings

Why do people feel more awake when they dream than they do when they’re awake?
Is it because the feeling of being awake is dulled by the sheer quantity of it, and that feeling, so rare to have in a dream, is so pronounced against a backdrop of complete un-wakefulness?
I somehow doubt it’s either one. It seems to me that there is a greater connection between our dreaming and the most awake moments we have ever experienced in our lives… those moments when we are completely aware of everything around as though each and every thing were alive and reaching for our attention. To be in this state of complete wakefulness, it is like a dream, and dreaming like being at our most awake. When we sleep, our brains process all the things that seem to just float by us without even knowing, that if we were to try to think about it, we wouldn’t even remember seeing… like the guy three seats down in a theater eating popcorn, what he was wearing, when he laughed. Our brains see these things, and they’re inside of us, EVERYTHING is inside of us, and it gets stored up like a great big battery for us to fall asleep and let it explode.

I want to walk through life as though I were completely awake in a way that all of my days are spent in awe and wonder at the vast infinite of everything.

How else could we be so unaware of the difference between sleep and awake?

Accomplishments

Accomplishments

The ninja pirate zombie robot head's single red eye comes to life, and looks around. It rolls up to a clockwork spine, and attaches itself to it at the neck. The resultant snakelike thing slithers over to a cheap toaster, and connects it to the bottom of the spine.
It then rolls around in pine tar, and attaches a couple of bones to its left side. It repeats this for the right side, and then attaches a clockwork claw to each arm.
Gears whir and bones grind as the thing picks up the Chest of the Bonerdagon and attaches it to the front of its spine. It then grabs a couple more wads of pine tar, and uses them to attach two spiked femurs to the toaster.
Fully constructed, the skeleton grabs a handful of disembodied brains, and casually munches on them as it sews a ninja outfit out of a couple of clockwork sheets.
Glancing at its new threads, it beeps approvingly. It loads its pockets with frigid ninja stars, teeny-tiny ninja stars, and a star throwing star, before grabbing an icy-hot katana with one hand and a blundarrrbuss with the other.
(image placeholder)

A Story

A Story


“The Importance of Rules” sounds like the title of a wicked thriller novel. I don’t even know what it would be about. I imagine someone whose life is bound by rules and starts to crumble as their capacity to fill every rule breaks down. Like a 1984 type world, less so to a large degree, from the point of view of someone who feels that the world is the way it should be.
I can imagine their faith breaking down, their questions for the need of the rules becoming more driving as their life tears wildly away from the plan. What society has the right to govern so much of what anyone thinks and feels, to hold anyone to a standard of maintenance in life, the irony of trying to hold humans to a more and more perfect standard.

I want to write that story.

Relaxed

Relaxed

It’s a really nice day, don’t know what else to say other than that. It was pretty cool outside when I got out of my room. I’ve been reading V for Vendetta every now and then, and so far it is very awesome, there are parts that aren’t as good as the movie, and there are parts where the graphic novel is better. I’d say it’s one of those fight club things where they just genuinely had a ton of respect when they made it even if they didn’t tote it as a selling point.I bought Heroes of Might and Magic V today online from the Ubisoft store for 64 total after tax, free 2 day shipping. I’ll get it before the game shops down here even think to stock it. I HATE gaming stores down here.

Anywho.. I got the limited edition… comes with Heroes III and IV on the same DVD as the main game, and a soundtrack CD. I love video game soundtracks. I so want the music from the original Myst still, and the Mechwarrior 2 soundtrack is some of the best music ever!

Heroes of Might and Magic V free high quality mini web game

The makers of Heroes V have also made this incredible web based strategy game. It's deep, involving, and it has no turn limit, unlike most other web based games. As if actually making a Heroes of Might and Magic game that really brings back the "one more turn" feel and quality of part I and II, they have gone and done this.

read more | digg story

Pre-Orders are Killing Gaming for Me

Pre-Orders are Killing Gaming for Me

Dreamfall: Longest Journey 2 has been out for the better part of the week now. No EB, Gamestop, or Gamecrazy near me has one for me to buy. No pre-order deal was offered, so I find myself unwilling to trade cash for nothing since I know there's no way the demand is so high that I can't get one for somewhere. Walmart will have it in half a week, but I know that the major game retailers won't ever have it unless it's pre-ordered.What is happening here when the needs of the hardcore gamer are better served by Walmart or Best Buy? It is extremely maddening to be punished for not pre-ordering games for which the demand is not nearly high enough to warrant paying the cash just to know it will be there waiting for me. I would rather buy it online, if they don't have the game I want, when I want it, I will go buy. Here is the part that really stings, the one time in the last several years where there was an actual need to pre-order due to scarcity, the XBOX 360, it wasn't enough to pre-order. No one got them anyway. That is the major flaw in the system, that is what really tears the concept of pre-ordering. It guarantees sales of sub par products prior to review and release, allows companies like Gamestop, EB Games, and Gamecrazy to pocket money with nothing in return at all because of their blackmail practice of not carrying games that are not pre-ordered, and fails to genuinely protect about the sort of actual product shortage that it was initially put in place because of.It is infuriating to be so ill treated by the industry I have invested so much time and money into. It is infuriating not to be able to go and buy the games that I want, games that I have been waiting for. It is infuriating to be left to order my games online when I want them, paying extra to have them shipped to me, and all of this because so many people are so happy to buy games before they come out, more often than not investing in games that are becoming increasingly sub par. Why? Because they get all their sales before the game is released based on the hype of the industry builds, with press refusing to show anything but the good of a game before release.With more and more game sales pressured to be made prior to release and review, accountability falls harder and harder onto previews to give bad impressions to let gamers know what they're getting before both games and gaming press become irrelevant because of a stung consumer base.

Talking

Talking

There’s not a lot of people I feel really comfortable talking to right now, I imagine I desire to crawl inside of a tiny shell where no one can talk to me at all in any way shape or fashion. Almost everyone in my life right now has an issue with me that I dread looking them in the eyes, knowing that it’s on their mind and that it is somehow my fault that it’s there. Joe is homeless, and I haven’t been able to do anything about it, Pattie and I broke up, and now she’s doing things like writing to Christ, telling him he never has to talk to her again. Marcia, Tara, and Mike all have this issue with the lease and house going, and that is a large stress in my life. That’s why I’m posting here. I think I’m going to give up my livejournal. That’s where I went for my room mates, I’ll still go there to look at Pattie’s blog, and to read my friends blogs, but for the most part, I don’t want to share with too many people.

I know Pattie will read this. I like that she reads this blog, I like that she knows my thoughts; she’s one of my best friends in the world. Chris might read this too. It seems that yesterday started out okay and then got very sad very fast. Maybe I was wrong in my decision and what I did. I didn’t premeditate it, it just sort of felt like the right thing to do about the issues that were being talked about. My brain is wrapping around itself full of questions and bothersome troubles.

I think that after Pattie reads this, she’s going to avoid me for the rest of the day, which is sad because this is my way of telling her that no matter what, I still want to spend the day talking to her. Things change though, and eventually she’s going to stop being comfortable with me, and she’ll stop talking to me, like so many people do, and ultimately move on.

Change is scary. Especially quarters.

I haven’t written in a while. It’s funny how I’ve done the least writing in times when the most has happened. Life has changed dramatically in the past week or so and it’s really emotional for me to talk about. Mike left for NJ on Monday morning and was really busy before that so little was seen of him. Won’t see him very much ever again. Maybe 3 times a year, tops.

Watching a cooking show right now where a guy made ice cream by taking the ingredients and his hand cranked ice cream maker to a glacier and hacking ice right out of the landscape. After he made it he said, “This is a rather complicated way of making ice cream, you can use a machine if you don’t have a hand cranked maker, and certainly if you don’t have a glacier handy you can use it right out of the freezer, but I like it better this way.”

That is funny to me… glacier made ice cream.

Sorry, that just seemed so immediate and wanted to write it before I forgot it before I went on with the heavy stuff.

So, I’m confused. I’m also pretty lonely. Sad is an excellent adjective for parts of how I feel, and incomplete as well. I’m really tired of writing all of this, even though it’s still fairly short and not a complete compilation of my feelings.

I want to write every day again. Maybe that will help me feel better.

How Diablo Killed the RPG

How Diablo Killed the RPG


About fifteen years ago adventure games were king. The many variety of quests available from Lucasarts and Sierra, among many others, ruled the day. Their detailed stories, animated characters and environments were rich and involving. Adventure games mixed character, and narrative that has rarely been matched by any other genre, as well as a level of character design and originality that drew in audiences and brought them to satisfying conclusions.

Here, now, the stage is set for the largest commercial success of its time, Myst, a record breaking game. Myst is compelling, it has beautiful dreamy styles that are comforting and are accompanied by ambient music that draws players in. Few games were made with so few resources, and so small a team, and more importantly, were of such a remarkable commercial success.

Forays into the adventure game genre began to mimic Myst, along with its divergences that separated it from traditional games. The slow disappearance of the genre followed shortly after. Without the sub par work of startup companies, and the mimicking work they provided, the popularity seemed to dwindle even more. Ultimately the market appeared, falsely, to be unable to support the genre any longer.

In a final step, even the largest and most successful producers of adventure games simply ceased producing them, canceling one at a time, until no more were being made on any level. A few still get made, one every few years, some even okay, but Myst destroyed the adventure game.

Like adventures, RPG games are loaded with difficulties. Branching endings take time to write and program, branching and significant dialog takes real artistic and literary investment and involvement. Creating open ended, yet functional, systems is consuming work that requires background, experience, or licenses. The more options you give the player, the more difficult to make the game, in its entirety.

However, despite these realities, the genre flourished. Companies like Black Isle lead the way with groundbreaking games that pushed the boundaries. Hundreds of companies followed, cloning the successful products. They failed, like they always do, but they drive the market share. At this point, along comes Diablo, a new approach that involved less effort in every conceivable point in development. While maintaining superficial similarities, Diablo offered simplified mechanics, a linear and branchless story with no decision-making or player freedom, as well as simplified dialog.

After that there is only the matter of drawing lines with a crayon. Steady decrease in RPG releases over the years, large numbers of Diablo clones at first, and then a slow following decline when they don’t sell at all due to poor quality and direct relation to a genre so tied to a single game that comparison is inescapable. When the time comes, almost nothing is left but the rare releases over time, entire years passing without so much as a single entry into the genre.

That, folks, is how Diablo killed the RPG.

The Serendipitous

The Serendipitous

“What are you doing here?”
“I don’t know.”
“How did you get here?”
“I found it on accident.”
“You’ll probably die here.”
“I don’t believe that.”
“Why not?”
“Because I’m serendipitous. I suffer from an extreme case of life altering luck.”
“Can you dodge bullets?”
“I believe they dodge me as long as I don’t walk in front of them, but then, maybe they’d still miss if I did.”
“You’re crazy.”
“Don’t believe in luck?”
“No.”
“Maybe you should.”
“How’s it work?”
“I don’t know, I just believe.”
“What do you believe?”
“I believe that someone has a chance to hit every lucky seven they ever throw for in their entire life, just as much as someone has a chance to crap out on the first throw every time they try. I always throw sevens…I throw them hard… I put my life and belief behind it…”
“That’s impossible.””No, just very, very unlikely.”

Spring Break Highlights

It has been an extremely long, good, fun, tragic, emotional, tiring weekend. Really, any adjective that you can think of can somehow be applied to the last four days of my mild life. On Wednesday I planted my hanging tomato garden, 4 types of tomatoes, two types of basil, orange habanero, and my lemon thyme in it. If the basil fails to sprout, the only thing that was not a seedling when I planted it, I’m going to replace it with strawberries. Strawberries and habaneros, that’s a nice combination. The most important thing I did on Thursday and Friday was to see V for Vendetta both days.



“This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is it vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished, as the once vital voice of the verisimilitude now venerates what they once vilified. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose vis-à-vis an introduction, and so it is my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V.”



That quote from the beginning pretty much sums up the entire movie. It’s not 100% accurate, there are some bits from that monologue that are missing from the film. It’s a wonderful movie. When we saw it Friday night we went and ate at IHOP afterwards and talked for about an hour or two after. I didn’t even get home till 4 in the morning from dropping the last friend off. I did all my sleeping for the whole weekend on Saturday morning.



V is the type of movie that you can see and then really TALK about, and that’s incredibly rare. We discussed issues, and feelings, and the direction of the world, how safe we felt and whether we though V was a good guy or a bad guy. We talked for hours about the smaller aspects, the reasoning behind the events and the subtleties. It was awesome. I want to see the movie again.



Saturday afternoon started with a phone call from my sister, filled with tears telling me that she had to move out of her boyfriend’s house. She quit her job to move in with him and he let her do that while he was thinking of going back to his old girlfriend. Then, he told her to move out by Sunday on Saturday. I could kick his ass.



There was nothing we could do about it on Saturday, but I did make plans to drive up there on Sunday with my dad.



The party we planned for Saturday went off without a hitch, it was awesome, and we played tons of games on the wall with the projector. It was totally sweet. I made the best Margaritas ever. Mike ordered pizza, and everyone was there, hanging out and playing games. Things broke up about midnight so that Mike and I could go to sleep, he had church in the morning and I was leaving my dad’s house for Dallas at eight. I still couldn’t sleep, I just couldn’t shut down my brain; it was scary. I’d never driven so far in my life.



So I got up at 7 and got ready, then I took Joe with me, he’d been hanging out all weekend, and I didn’t have a radio, my dad said he might ride with my sister on the way back, so I figured he could talk to me to keep me awake. We got back right around 8 in the evening, lots of adventures, but it’s really hard to keep it all straight and talk about it, mostly, it was long, and tiring, and I was feeling sick from not sleeping. I dropped Joe off and went home to sleep as soon as I could. I skipped school this morning because I was tired and it was raining. I didn’t feel like walking through the rain to my class. I would have done it any day but after a day like Sunday with 40 hours of no sleep.



I have some images I’ll post later from something my dad found and gave back to me.

Height of Spring Break

It has been an extremely long, good, fun, tragic, emotional, tiring weekend. Really, any adjective that you can think of can somehow be applied to the last four days of my mild life. On Wednesday I planted my hanging tomato garden, 4 types of tomatoes, two types of basil, orange habanero, and my lemon thyme in it. If the basil fails to sprout, the only thing that was not a seedling when I planted it, I’m going to replace it with strawberries. Strawberries and habaneros, that’s a nice combination. The most important thing I did on Thursday and Friday was to see V for Vendetta both days.

“This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is it vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished, as the once vital voice of the verisimilitude now venerates what they once vilified. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose vis-à-vis an introduction, and so it is my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V.”

That quote from the beginning pretty much sums up the entire movie. It’s not 100% accurate, there are some bits from that monologue that are missing from the film. It’s a wonderful movie. When we saw it Friday night we went and ate at IHOP afterwards and talked for about an hour or two after. I didn’t even get home till 4 in the morning from dropping the last friend off. I did all my sleeping for the whole weekend on Saturday morning.

V is the type of movie that you can see and then really TALK about, and that’s incredibly rare. We discussed issues, and feelings, and the direction of the world, how safe we felt and whether we though V was a good guy or a bad guy. We talked for hours about the smaller aspects, the reasoning behind the events and the subtleties. It was awesome. I want to see the movie again.

Saturday afternoon started with a phone call from my sister, filled with tears telling me that she had to move out of her boyfriend’s house. She quit her job to move in with him and he let her do that while he was thinking of going back to his old girlfriend. Then, he told her to move out by Sunday on Saturday. I could kick his ass.

There was nothing we could do about it on Saturday, but I did make plans to drive up there on Sunday with my dad.

The party we planned for Saturday went off without a hitch, it was awesome, and we played tons of games on the wall with the projector. It was totally sweet. I made the best Margaritas ever. Mike ordered pizza, and everyone was there, hanging out and playing games. Things broke up about midnight so that Mike and I could go to sleep, he had church in the morning and I was leaving my dad’s house for Dallas at eight. I still couldn’t sleep, I just couldn’t shut down my brain; it was scary. I’d never driven so far in my life.

So I got up at 7 and got ready, then I took Joe with me, he’d been hanging out all weekend, and I didn’t have a radio, my dad said he might ride with my sister on the way back, so I figured he could talk to me to keep me awake. We got back right around 8 in the evening, lots of adventures, but it’s really hard to keep it all straight and talk about it, mostly, it was long, and tiring, and I was feeling sick from not sleeping. I dropped Joe off and went home to sleep as soon as I could. I skipped school this morning because I was tired and it was raining. I didn’t feel like walking through the rain to my class. I would have done it any day but after a day like Sunday with 40 hours of no sleep.

I have some images I’ll post later from something my dad found and gave back to me.

Vacation

I don’t really like doing nothing at all, I didn’t do NOTHING, I mean, I did a ton of work in Metal Slug Advance. I’ve completed 4 of the 5 missions with gold complete status, and I’ve gotten really good at kicking the final baddy’s buttocks. I also listened to a few totally new songs and played urban dead, and the real productive thing I did was work on Red Horizon, which is coming out very nicely.

My mom is coming over to do laundry again, they’re starting work on fixing her house soon, so happy days there. I got Thursday and Friday off! Huzzah! Now… I don’t want to go to Oklahoma, I’d really like to stay here and plant plants and roleplay on Thursday, watch V for Vendetta on Friday, work in the yard on Saturday, and roleplay on Sunday evening. I really don’t like the thought of spending all that time driving, waiting for mom to do a job interview, then spending little time with Grandma and Grandpa and then a little time with them in church, then leaving and getting back late on Sunday, missing the game, and having to get up early for school the next day. I just don’t feel like it.

Weekend!

This weekend was super-awesome and full. On Friday I had my test in class, and that went okay, plus something else, I know something else really important happened on Friday, but I can’t remember what it was. Oh, now I do. I had dinner with my mom at that Lebanese restaurant, which was really interesting. They had a belly dancer, this time, and it wasn’t what I expected belly dancing to be. I thought the hand gestures were really interesting and essential to it. Her smile was REALLY creepy. Like a doll, or something, it was just so frozen and big.

Anywho, so, I did manage to get plans together for a decent sized grill on Saturday, and that went really well. The day started kind of late, I played F.E.A.R. until 3 in the afternoon, which was enough time to beat the game. The whole time I had trouble getting a hold of mom, who promised to bring some stuff for the bbq, but then never called back, she eventually did bring something, but, she brought it too late to use because so much other food was done. It’s okay though. Jackson, Justin, Jake, John, Kevin, Russell, Tim, Mike, Cymeron, and my mom showed up. The food came out really, really well, and a GREAT time was had by all, even more than usual. John’s xbox kept Cymeron happy, and my mom watched Firefly on the TV, and everyone else played various games and just chatted all night. There were smoked hamburgers, awesome jalapeno poppers, and divine baked beans as well as lamb ribs (not nearly as good as the last set). I learned a few new things about the quality of smoke because some of the smoke was acrid because of the way I accidentally smothered the fire initially, I’d heard about it before but always thought, since I never experienced it, that I just wasn’t good enough to taste it. Now that I’ve actually made the mistake I know that I just wasn’t making it before. You can tell, it’s a dark stingy taste; it got into some of the onions.

Jackson got some of us playing trade wars and it ended up being very cool. I think it would be very awesome to play online over OpenRPG. All you’d have to do is scan the board in and the pieces and you could use the map screen to play any board game, this one would be very cool to use like that because of how simple it is. Anyhow, the night went late, then I fell asleep after playing online some and cleaning up. The next day started just as late and all I did was beat Metal Slug Advance, eat lunch at IHOP with my mom, and play RPG with John… met the new player and discussed his character and he will be able to play next game session.

And that takes me up to today… I finally asked for some time off, I may get Thursday and Friday off, and that will be cool, I just don’t want to travel out of town.

Random Sadness

I feel really alone in my new house. It’s like… I don’t even know Tara, and Marcia is never there, and Mike is going away soon. That’s not fun.


Rodeo Cook Off in two weeks though! Yay!!

Matador

I kindof want to see the Matador. It looks like a pretty amusing movie. Though, frankly, there’s no movie that I REALLY want to see till V for Vendetta comes out in mid March this year. Same with games. There aren’t any that I want, not till Call of Cthulhu comes out, but that’s starting to look like it will never be on PC. Makes me want to go kick some developers in their shins for putting it on Xbox first. Anyway, it’s a really beautiful day out, nice and sunny, but it’s making me sleepy.

I’m also watching dilbert, which is cool. Zac might hang out tonight.